Thank you all

I am always overwhelmed by the outpouring (is that a word?) of concern and support that I get from the IF community on the internet. Thanks to each of you for your comments. It means a lot to know that I am not alone.

I had the d&c yesterday. I'm back at work today. I just didn't see the point of sitting at home alone with all the time in the world to wallow in self-pity. I can wallow just as easily at work, thereby saving my sick days for when it is 85 and sunny out and I get my annual case of spring/summer fever. Anyhoo, we will have a report from the genetics lab in 4-6 weeks. So until then we will take a much needed break from the high tech ART world. I want to take a vacation and I am seriously considering a career change. Really, I just want to spend some time focusing on me. I want to feel good about myself again.

Surprisingly, I'm not very weepy today. I'm probably still in shock. If I'm lucky, I can time my pending breakdown for this weekend, safely tucked away in the comfort of my own home.

I thought I would find some comfort in my return to the morning iced soy chai latte from Sta.rbucks. But it just gave me the shakes. Evil caffeine jitters. It's just as well since I really plan to use this time off to lose some weight and adapt a healthier lifestyle. Since I've been off the caffeine for so long, I shouldn't even indulge in that addiction, right? Right.